A Toast to 2020

My mother used to tell me, "if you are bored, then you are boring." As an adult and having time to reflect on that statement, I know that how I look at a situation is up to me and me alone. I am choosing to be bored if that is what I actively choose to do. The same can be said for many other feelings like anger, sadness, and happiness.

The overwhelming negativity towards 2020 is so bad for us, and we are choosing it daily. We decided on it every single day last year. Blame blame blame—victim victim victim. If you think 2020 was such a lousy year, maybe you are a negative person.

Looking back at last year, which honestly is a silly thing to do because it and every day, nay every second is already behind us. I don't have much bad to say. Did 2020 have a negative side? Yup. Could I control any of it? Nope. All I could do then and all I can do now is control my thoughts and actions.

For most of last year, I got to spend more time than ever with my wife, my dog, and my thoughts. These are things that, in years past, I have wanted. Things I have complained about not having. "I never have enough time to do what I want!" I got to have lunch with my wife every single day! That is something that has never happened since we've known each other. That is a win in my book.

I got my sleep under control—I knock out a solid 8 hours every night.

I started this newsletter, a podcast, and an internet talk show!

I made new friends and solidified old relationships.

I read more books than any past year of my life.

I built a gym in the basement, and I use it.

I FINALLY painted the dining room.

I cooked every single day.

I learned to be still.

If 2020 was like all the rest of the years I've lived through, I doubt any of those things would have happened.

Oh, and I forgot the big one—I'm still alive. My eyes keep opening, my brain keeps firing, and my heart keeps ticking. It does me no good to waste the daily gift of life with negativity. There are plenty of people from last year that no longer get to make that choice.

So do I blame 2020 for a bad year? Not at all. For one, placing blame on a year, a period of time, or a calendar is weird. Those are all lifeless human-made constructs that can't even accept the responsibility, nor do they deserve it. How silly does it feel making a calendar your scapegoat? Can you be mad at a clock?

I also can't blame another person, another country, politics, or the weather. At no point in my life has blame ever worked out for me. Blaming anything is a waste of breath and brainpower. We can only learn from these experiences. If the same thing keeps surprising you, maybe it is time to stop being surprised when it happens again.

You also can't control the pandemic. This virus is as natural as things get. It is part of what makes us human on this planet. It is the price of living. The same could be said about getting a flat tire or smacking your thumb with a hammer. Does it suck? Yes. Could you prevent it? No. So the question is, what do you do now? Lay down and cry about it? Just leave the car there on the side of the road? Drop the hammer and give up? No! You roll your sleeves up, change that tire, and get on your way! You yell "FUCK" as loud as you can, suck your thumb for a second, and then drive that nail into the wood and move on to the next one. Blaming anything, the road, the nail, the car, yourself, will get you nowhere. You can only move forward.

There will always be viruses. We have to live with them. It is part of the agreement we unconsciously make in exchange for living. We learn from viruses and adapt like we have to do with all our other mistakes. Keep a spare in the trunk. Keep your eye on the head of the nail. Wash your hands. Wear a mask.

To reiterate, was 2020 a bad year? 2020 doesn't even know it happened. Only we do, and we are in control of our actions and thoughts. Perhaps it took 2020 to get my head screwed on straight. You won't hear me complaining here. I don't have the patience for it, and I respect all of you too much to waste your time that way.

In terms of things I had control over, I'd say I had a pretty great year, and the things I learned living through it will help make 2021 even better.